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Post by preraph on Apr 10, 2012 20:13:07 GMT -5
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Post by happy2bchildfree on Apr 11, 2012 12:44:43 GMT -5
The murderers are seem to be getting younger and younger... Used to be you never heard about anything like this.  |
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Post by preraph on Apr 11, 2012 17:28:46 GMT -5
From a rehabilitation standpoint, you have to intervene with these kids before they're 7 to change them from turning bad like this. Honestly, you can tell by the time a kid is in fifth grade if he's going to be a bad criminal. You think that's bad, check this story out. What kills me is national news is ignoring it totally. These boys pushed someone in front of a train after beating them. crimeblog.dallasnews.com/archives/2012/04/fighting-back-tears-dallas-jud.html |
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Post by happy2bchildfree on Apr 12, 2012 16:03:25 GMT -5
I hadn't heard about that incident in Dallas. And who knows what else is going on elsewhere that we don't hear about.
As for the potential young criminals not getting intervention when they are very young, I think a lot of people just tend to dismiss behaviors at that age and just don't take them seriously like they should. Until it's too late...
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Post by preraph on Apr 14, 2012 11:55:51 GMT -5
Yeah, exactly. We need a system in place to intervene with family counseling whenever there is a bad kid. The entire family needs it if the kid is that messed up.
I recently saw a letter this lady wrote asking advice where she was mad at her grown daughter for not "forgiving" her bully brother, fully grown with kids, and making their holidays miserable. She thinks the daughter ought to forgive him because he has his own kids now and is "obviously" not like that anymore. Riight. He's never apologized to her or anything either. Parents can be so blind and stubborn and will actually punish the other sibling for not also living in denial, even when they're getting physically beat up and abused!
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Post by happy2bchildfree on Apr 14, 2012 16:05:48 GMT -5
Yeah, exactly. We need a system in place to intervene with family counseling whenever there is a bad kid. The entire family needs it if the kid is that messed up. I recently saw a letter this lady wrote asking advice where she was mad at her grown daughter for not "forgiving" her bully brother, fully grown with kids, and making their holidays miserable. She thinks the daughter ought to forgive him because he has his own kids now and is "obviously" not like that anymore. Riight. He's never apologized to her or anything either. Parents can be so blind and stubborn and will actually punish the other sibling for not also living in denial, even when they're getting physically beat up and abused! When a kid that young is having issues it is generally problems within the family, I think. The whole family needs therapy. I get so annoyed at the advice columnists whose advice about an abusive family member is to accept the abuse and let it go because after all, it's "family". I don't agree with that AT ALL. Just because I happen to share DNA with someone (or they are an in-law) doesn't give them the right to treat me poorly. Some relationships simply aren't salvageable and it's better and healthier to let them go. Most people don't see it that way. I am dealing with a situation like that in my own life. At this point I still must maintain some contact until this inheritance is completely settled. Once that happens, I am so done with those people. Malicious, toxic people have no place in my life, regardless of who they are. I might come to the place someday where I will be able to forgive, but even if that happens, forgiveness doesn't mean you have to allow an unsafe person back into your life. |
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Post by preraph on Apr 16, 2012 17:46:00 GMT -5
Yes, forgiveness doesn't mean you accept the behavior. Forgiveness is an indication that you have been able to understand that that person has problems, and that those problems may be an accumulation over a lifetime, and for whatever reason, they are not willing or able to behave decently in certain situations. It's really just about acknowledging that it's not always all focused on you and that everyone is different and that we can't always know why a person does something. I'm still working on forgiving someone entirely that really caused me some serious grief twice. Nonetheless, I know that person is a decent human being. He just couldn't understand how much these things would affect me, and that's my issues partly, and his lack of experience and understanding. Doesn't mean we wouldn't get right back into the old patterns that end up hurting me, but after decades I no longer anguish over it all and am able to be friendly in email and like that. We have to accept diversity, but we don't have to subject ourselves to abuse.
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