|
|
Post by jessica on Jul 14, 2007 18:21:45 GMT -5
I don't think you need to decide now. I think you know you aren't ready for kids right now. At least I think someone who thinks drinking soda is going to prevent pregnancy is NOT ready for children. You don't need something permanent if you're undecided. You DO need something for the time being, though. Decide the rest later.
|
|
|
|
Post by preraph on Jul 14, 2007 19:58:17 GMT -5
Honestly, I think someone who thinks drinking soda prevents pregnancy should definitely NOT have kids because it shows they're not mature enough to have become informed.
|
|
|
|
Post by Devin on Jul 15, 2007 13:49:22 GMT -5
I think this woman should have something permanent done. Because any woman who is passed age 15 years. And thinks drinking cola. Will prevent pregnancy. Is too stupid to be a good mother. If she did have children. I think she has been sleeping in school.
Devin
|
|
|
|
Post by Aimee on Jul 19, 2007 9:45:49 GMT -5
Any woman that thinks Coca-Cola is a Birth Control method. Must think a Highway is a play ground for children. And should stay childfree. Until she learns how The Human body works!
|
|
|
|
Post by Four Children on Jul 19, 2007 11:36:44 GMT -5
The 3 main causes of divorce are issues relating to sex, money, and children. I should start by saying I have 4 children so my opinnion is probably slanted; however, honesty is what you should build your relationship upon. If you don't want children be up front and honest, if he does want children then you need to decide what is more important the marriage or children. He will also have to make the same decision. If you can not come to some kind of agreement then sounds like you should look elsewhere.
I agree that you should not have a child for others. Raising children requires time and committment. Your life will never be the same; however, as with everything there are good and bad things to having children.
I would consider it a betrayal of the highest order if my spouse was activitly pursuing having or not having children without us first discussing this issue. When you agreed to be his wife you agreed to have an open and honest relationship. Again if you don't want children and he does, preventing it without his knowledge will only lead to worse problems down the road. I am not saying you should give in, if you believe strongly you need to convience him or end the relationship.
The questions you have to ask yourself is which is more important (assuming he won't change his mind, and he will have to ask himself the same question) What is more important children or you spouse? Everyone makes sacrifices in a relationship is having children too big a sacrifce for you?
Good luck in whatever you decide.
|
|
|
|
Post by Jo19 on Jul 31, 2007 19:14:53 GMT -5
|
|
|
|
Post by Emma on Aug 5, 2007 11:33:21 GMT -5
Do not have a baby to keep everyone else happy!!
I just stumbled across this site in the last 10mins literally, here is someone elses story. Hope it does not bore you!
I married when I was 21. Had no plans for children as I worked with other people's.. was happy with that way of working!
My husband I knew at the time would never have minded children, but at the end of they day he wanted to be with me as me, over anything else. Then at the age of 26, I found myself thinking about the issue more, but still very undecided. I talked to my husband about it, and we both decided to let it rest in the lap of nature.. if it happened it happened if not, then not. We were living abroad at the time, so gave ourselves a time limit of one year.. didn't go out of our way to try for a baby, but 8mths later I fell pregnant.
I want to reassure you, please do not feel ashamed of not knowing if you want children or not, because I never knew.. it took my decision of leaving it to nature to help me out, which probably sounds very daft, but I knew we were in a better situation financially, I felt I would be more ready if it were to happen.
snigger to the being more ready bit.. being a mum, no one can predict the feelings, hard work, issues that can appear, but I wouldn't to this day go back on that decision I made. I have a 4 yr old who complete strangers will compliment me on due to his behaviour and friendliness (don't expect that to last forever!)
There is a whole experience I have gained, that borrowing other kids can not replicate.. we recently decided to go for the leave it to fate again option and um well expecting number 2.
My advice is to talk honestly with your husband.. and if you decide to stay childless that isn't something to feel bad about.
It may take longer for things to become clearer for you. I have a friend who swore blind she would not have children, then at 35, something kicked in and I was gobsmacked to watch a very much career minded lady go and have 2 children with her partner who had also been set on having no children.. they still can't believe it 5 yrs later and have no regrets.
Don't feel pushed into deciding though.
|
|
|
|
Post by Emma on Aug 5, 2007 11:38:09 GMT -5
oops, excuse the mistakes  that should have been snigger to being ready not sblack, as an example.. can't type! |
|
|
|
Post by Emma on Aug 5, 2007 11:42:31 GMT -5
oops, excuse the mistakes ::  done it again, chuckle then to being not ready.. stupid thing mucks it around when I type afters |
|
|
|
Post by jessica on Aug 9, 2007 13:23:18 GMT -5
I found myself thinking about the issue more, but still very undecided. I talked to my husband about it, and we both decided to let it rest in the lap of nature.. if it happened it happened if not, then not. We were living abroad at the time, so gave ourselves a time limit of one year.. didn't go out of our way to try for a baby, but 8mths later I fell pregnant It's great you were financially able, which is more than we can say for most parents... but don't you think every baby should be a wanted one? One that is planned? Rather than one conceived out of indifference? |
|
|
|
Post by eoraptor on Aug 9, 2007 17:21:57 GMT -5
See my post in the other thread.
And if you care for your children and take measures to raise them to be good people and don't let them run around wildly without consequence, then you're a parent, not a breeder. We like parents.
|
|
mar
Full Member
Posts: 237
|
Post by mar on Oct 18, 2008 10:58:47 GMT -5
Go down about 1/3 of the way on the page of the above site to the chart "WHY BREED ?" It is priceless !! I know you'll enjoy it. |
|
|
|
Post by tinroofer on Oct 19, 2008 18:57:27 GMT -5
Wow.
Get some BC pills, get through your first pack, see how you feel about things, THEN talk to your hubs about the kid issue.
That month might let you relax and quit with the 'old wives tales' stuff.
Without the paranoia of getting pregnant you might be able to think things through a little better.
|
|
|
|
Post by lys on Oct 19, 2008 19:51:58 GMT -5
Make sure you dont drink from other peoples cups, that can cause pregnancy too... I dont know this letter seems like BS to me... |
|
|
|
Post by happy2bchildfree on Oct 19, 2008 20:27:15 GMT -5
Make sure you dont drink from other peoples cups, that can cause pregnancy too... I dont know this letter seems like BS to me... I think so too. I just can't believe that anyone is really that ignorant. |
|
|
|
Post by midoria on Oct 19, 2008 21:09:49 GMT -5
This post is really old. It looks like they haven't come back since they first posted it.
|
|
|
|
Post by nokidsplease87 on Oct 21, 2008 10:30:59 GMT -5
This post is really old. It looks like they haven't come back since they first posted it. Yeah. The whole thing seems bogus to me anyway. Or maybe I'm just hoping its bogus because I'd like to believe that this person is not so stupid that they think drinking soda will increase your chances of getting pregnant.  |
|
done it again, chuckle then to being not ready.. stupid thing mucks it around when I type afters 
