Dad Never Again: Exaggerated Vasectomy Story

[Tabetha]

In Slate Magazine at www.slate.com/id/2182063/ there's a really whiny article by Michael Lewis where he (almost certainly) exaggerates the experience he had getting a vasectomy.

This irritates me greatly, because in many cases, vasectomies are less invasive and expensive than tubals so a properly done vasectomy can sometimes be a better choice than a tubal for some couples.

When my husband got his vasectomy, he told me that the fear leading up to it was much worse than the actual procedure and the minor discomfort afterwards and many of the remaining reader comments on Slate seem to echo his opinion.

(There used to be dozens of comments from men disagreeing with the tone of his article but apparently they were deleted.)

Another interesting thing about the article, is that his wife (former MTV VJ Tabitha Sorenson) has given birth 3 times. His Dad Again series on Slate is mostly about his coming to terms with fatherhood and his lack to fully arise to the occasion when his wife needs him, so I suppose his exaggerated take on the sacrifice he made when he got his vasectomy probably shouldn't surprise me.

Here's the article: Dad Never Again: The Nutcracker Suite.

And here's one of his Dad Again articles:
Monsters: Have I screwed up my daughters forever?

[Ninja]

I remember my dad getting the snip. He just went to the clinic and our mother took us to the park for a few hours. Then we picked him up again, and he was fine. All he had to do was hold a bag of ice against his privates to reduce the swelling, and he had to take the car to work for a few days because the bycicle was a torture device ;D

Michael is just a big baby...

[happy2bchildfree]

The men I've known who were snipped all described the experience as not a big deal at all.

But then again I've heard plenty of whiny descriptions of having a tubal whereas for the me it was nothing.

We are all different and we don't all respond in the same way to same experience.

[nokidsplease87]

That article is rather ridiculous. Having a vasectomy has nothing to do with your "manliness" or whatever. If he feels his "manhood" has been violated, its only because he just rolled over and got it done because his wife suggested it, not because he made any kind of real decision about it or at least had a real conversation about it with his wife. And you know this will turn out to be the wife's fault for suggesting it. *roll eyes*

I also just read the "Monsters" article he wrote, and I can see why his wife wouldn't want more kids. It also is one of those nice, feel good stories for those of us who are childfree and know we will never have to deal with such brats of our own. I think its interesting as well that his wife is frequently hysterical and medicated (from how he makes it sound). I just can't imagine why that could possibly be....

[Doug]

I read the vasectomy piece. He DEFINITELY exaggerated, I would say.

I also read the article titled, 'Have I Screwed Up My Daughters Forever?'

My GOD, those kids sound like uberbrats. They even fight over who gets to call the coin toss which the father uses to 'settle disputes.' Shudder.

Once again.....NEVER EVER EVER will that be my life. Hooray!

I keep trying to figure out what aspect of raising children is at all enjoyable. Here are my feelings on it at this point, and my mom does agree with me:

'The only fun part of having kids is making 'em. It's all downhill from there.'

[Nephthys]

The tone in this guy's articles just irritates the hell out of me. But while mindlessly browsing through his columns, I did see one thing that made me grin ...

Anyone who watched MTV pretty much knows what Tabitha Sorenson looked like. Not a fox, but not a shabby lookin' broad either.

Three children later and it looks like she belongs in a refugee camp and is mere milliseconds away from calling the suicide hotline.

[ana]

My hubby had no complications with his vas. Just a nap with frozen peas and he was good to go. BUT, my friend's hubby and a co-worker both were swollen and black and blue for at least a week after their procedures.

I think you should take the time to find out everything about the doctor that's cutting you! I researched and found the best in the area and my DH had a relatively pain-free procedure. Coincidence? I think not.

[kentuckykimmie]

Even if the man's balls are black and blue for a week, this is mild in comparison to what childbirth does to a woman's body, forever. It's also mild in comparison to replicating human beings and then not even doing a minute portion of your fair share to see that they are raised properly. I would say that even the most painful of experiences with a vasectomy is but a drop in the bucket when compared to the lifelong mental, physical, and financial obligations which accompanies having children and raising them thoughtfully and properly.

I have trouble feeling sorry for a man who has already sired three screwed up kids who is whining about his temporary scrotal pain. Let him have a period every single month for 40+ years and experience that discomfort and inconvenience, then I might listen to his whining. If he expects the average woman to feel sorry for him, he is looking in the wrong place for sympathy. At leat he had it done though, which is more than I can say for most of the men I have known over the years. To most(not all) men, birth control, having and raising kids, is a "female problem". I guess it's to be expected that some will whine and want attention when they actively take a role in anything child related like birth control, which women have done for years and years and years .......................with no fanfare.

[chrisc]

I have had a vasectomy and am also a nurse working in an Emergency Room. I can tell you both, first hand from experience, that

1) Vasectomy isnt bad at all. I refer to it as the best decision I have ever done. I alternated bags of frozen peas on the boys and it worked great! I had sex the next day. I am NOT kidding.

2) guys are whimps. I see them flipping out all the time over paper cuts in the Emergency Room. I think its because women experience pain and bleeding every 28 days and are more used to it. On second thought, maybe guys are just pansies. lol

My biggest piece of advice for vasectomies is make sure you have a free thinking doctor. If you live in the Bible belt, make sure you lie to your doctor about having children, as many will refuse to do it if you dont have kids. Thankfully, mine didnt care that I didnt have kids at the time! :-)

[preraph]

Great advice! Thank you. You know, it IS odd that guys are so brave about so many things but usually big babies when it comes to anything to do with a doctor... Of course, I can understand the cringe factor about anything to do with cutting on delicate bits, but in reality it doesn't amount to much, as you said.

[noregrets78]

That guy was a wuss. Mine was a joke. Sure it's uncomfortable but the long term rewards FAR outweigh any discomfort you may have in the first few days.